Bernie Dieter’s Club Kabarett, at Meat Market - 100 minutes, including interval

Adult entertainment at its glorious, risqué, musical and side-splitting best.

That is what you are in for when you enter the house of debauchery that is Bernie Dieter’s Club Kabarett.

Leaving little to the imagination, it is slick, sexy, salacious and oh so much fun. 

It is a superbly orchestrated show for the broad minded.

I refer to a series of cabaret acts with a live band and original songs and anthems performed by the mistress of ceremonies Bernie Dieter.

In fact, it is Dieter who warms up the crowd (and how!) by joining the audience and asking us to get a little “intimate”.

Holding large, soft pom poms, which she discards, and dressed in a black body suit covered in glittering hands, she asks those around her to get handsy with her.

It is an hilarious introduction to a production that deliberately pushes the boundaries.

For much of the 80 minutes, Bernie is there to lend her powerful and melodic vocals to the energising music played by the imposing three-piece haus band. 

That includes a series of numbers where she is front and centre, along with background material while other artistes are strutting their stuff.

Wearing skimpy, red vinyl and donning long, shiny black platform boots, Melissa Lee is a limber pole dancer extraordinaire.

She in quite the performer, returning after interval to fly high, being lifted and swung around by her hair, generating audible intakes of breath among the crowd.

Mind you, doing the seemingly impossible is a mainstay of this production.

Caleb Cameron is a super cool and aggressive tap dancer, a fine exponent of his craft, who has us on side from the get go. His two sets also span the intermission.

Jacqueline Furey doesn’t mind shedding her gear while breathing fire – literally. 

As if that isn’t dangerous enough, a series of swords slip effortlessly down her throat. Oh my! Don’t try that at home.

Lachlan Barlett is Ivan Rosebud, a statuesque performance artist who comes dressed to the nines, before disrobing and revealing his private parts.

Later, what they do with a cream pie must be seen to be believed. Patrons are staggered.

How does one twist and bend their body almost to breaking point and smile while doing so?

It is a question that could be posed to world class contortionist Soliana Erse, whose balance and poise are extraordinary.

Jarred Dewey is a picture of concentration, grace and skill as his trapeze act in striking, bejewelled blue heels is next level. 

With lascivious charm, Bernie Dieter preaches girl power and love in a world that is too often disconnected.

Right at home with a haunting ballad or a full-throated drinking song, she is in her element with Club Kabarett and we are the beneficiaries.

She and her formidable troupe take a walk on the wild side, ensuring that together they make this an unforgettable experience. 

Club Kabarett is on at Meat Market in North Melbourne until 24^th May, 2026.